Sunday, March 9, 2008
Olivia's birth continued 3
My doctor switched places with the nurse and told me that the cord had prolapsed, the baby's heart rate was down and they had to get the baby out now.
I don't remember what was said, but I knew very quickly that the anesthesiologist could not get there fast enough. I knew what that meant. I would feel the knife.
I didn't feel many contractions after that, but I was uncomfortable with the doctor's hand pushing on the baby's head trying to keep pressure off the cord. I began saying, "Jesus" over and over again into the oxygen mask.
After just a few minutes, the doctor said, "We just have to do it. Randi Sue, you are going to have to be brave."
I thought, " I will be brave. I will do what has to be done. I choose to trust my God to be in control."
The next thing I knew, someone was pushing me into the operating room. Now I could not hear the baby's heart beat because the monitor was off of me. I wondered if her heart was even beating.
After I moved to the operating table, the doctor was no longer able to keep pressure off of the cord. She was standing on my right side, preparing to operate. A nurse was standing on my left side, and after she put in the i. v. , she held my hand. She must have been there to calm me, but her hand was trembling.
I was trying my best to follow directions, stay calm, prepare myself emotionally for a dead or brain damaged baby. I finally had great peace when I believed that God was going to take care of me and the whole situation. I knew that I could trust Him with my life. At some point, I said out loud. "It is going to be all right no matter what." I meant, "Dead baby, live baby, or brain damaged baby, my God will take care of me and give me the grace I need to get me through this."
I felt an overwhelming sense that the God of the Universe, the Maker of Creation was in control of my life ad would take care of me.
I remember the first cut feeling mild, because of the lido cane. One of the cuts, the nurse asked my kids names. I answered through the pain. The next cut she asked how old they were. Again, I concentrated on answering the question instead of the pain. Finally, on one cut, I screamed and I think I moaned the rest of the time.
I felt the baby being pulled out, but did not hear her cry. I didn't know whether she was alive or dead. I heard the team of nurses say, "Breathe baby, breathe." Their calm sounding voice confused me. At last, I heard someone say that her oxygen level was good. Then I saw someone carry a pink baby with lots of dark hair out of the room.
I complained as the doctor removed the placenta, and the doctor said she had to get the placenta out, but she would wait to do the rest. The last thing I remember was her standing there waiting.
I woke up about an hour later to my doctor standing over me, crying and saying, "It's your faith It's your faith."
Later, I asked her what she meant by that. She said that she did not know how I could have stayed so still and calm. I told her that I was trusting God and she said that she could tell.
Olivia wasn't breathing when she was born. Her apgar was 3. The nurses hand pumped her oxygen for some time until she was put on a breathing machine. About 6 hours after she was born, she was transported to a hospital with a NICU. She spent 4 days in NICU and then 7 days in the special care nursery. She came home a perfectly healthy baby, breast fed and all. To God be the glory for my miracle!